How to Write a Lay Report

By JT Tran

Really? This again?

Another redundant lay report bragging about how some pick up artist perfectly gamed and slept with a hot blonde… Really? I KNOW you have seen these. I know you have. Don’t lie and say you haven’t… I can see your face right now, you’re lying. Hell, you’ve probably even written one of these boring lay reports yourself and tried to show other guys how to get laid!

Hey, don’t worry, no judgement here. I just want to get you pick up artists caught up to the modern era so we can all write the best, most helpful lay reports possible, with no bragging, no bullshit, and no questions unanswered.

But why write a lay report?

There seems to be some confusion among pick up artists as to what the genuine purpose of a lay report is. Some people think they are to chronicle your progress, some people think they exist to de-brief and figure out what you did wrong, and some people just use them to brag about how to get laid and who they did it with.

Having a picture of your journey to success as a pick up artist is great. Getting the show the world that you know how to bag and tag beautiful ladies is even better. But what are you going to learn from that about how to get laid? The best lay reports allow you to deconstruct your night and replicate your successes.

And if the only reason you’re writing lay reports is to try and prove to the world that non-Asian women love Asian men, you can stop wasting your breath right now, because we know that yellow fever has swept the planet.

Instead, use them as an opportunity to show exactly how to sleep with those gorgeous women.

Look back at the last lay report you wrote. What went right? What do you need to axe? What needs to be added to your permanent skillbook? These are the things you need to consider when you’re writing your next lay report and reminding yourself how to get laid.

Unfortunately, this is often easier said than done. A good, concise, and informative lay report is a lot harder to write than most pick up artists might think (if you’ve already given it a stab, then you already know what I’m talking about). Instead of wrestling the words out of yourself about how you got laid, read on to learn how to make lay reports work for you.

How To Make Lay Reports Work For You

Writing is an art. And pick-up is an art. They come together to form lay reports, the writing of which is also an art. This means that, while there is room for interpretation, there are definite ways that you can go right and that you can go wrong when writing them.

  1.  Tell the truth – This step is pretty darn straightforward. If you are not telling the truth, there is absolutely NO point to writing lay reports. It will just CONFUSE EVERYONE INVOLVED and you will learn NOTHING about how to get laid. It will confuse YOU because your ego will allow you to believe that you’re doing better than you are, which will only hinder your progress as a pick up artist. Furthermore, it will confuse everyone else because, if they take your non-existent successes and tips on how to get laid to heart, and apply the inaccurate “knowledge” that you’re providing, they’ll just be WORSE-OFF than before hand. Don’t do this to your fellow men. It’s low, misleading, and vaguely pathetic.
  2. Use the structure – No need to flounder around about what to write about; simply use the ABCs structure to write your lay reports. This will not only allow you to draft your report in your head more easily, but it will also speed up the writing process. Furthermore, any pick up artist who reads it will easily be able to understand it and follow your tips about how to get laid. It will also re-enforce the structure in your own mind, improving your game as you write.
  3. Say what worked – Have a section (or embed a section) about what worked in your interactions. Praise yourself for what you did well as a pick up artist. Explain why it worked, and/or how you plan on using that to your advantage in the future. Write down on a slip of paper everything that you did right that you want to duplicate the next time that you’re in field, so you can take it with you.
  4. Say what didn’t – Also, have (or embed) a section about what DIDN’T work so well. I strongly believe that mistakes and “failures” are, hands-down, the best learning opportunities. The biggest thing that can get in between you and success as a pick up artist besides fear is your own ego. Being unwilling to admit mistakes is just a sign of ego; if you can let go of this, I promise you your progress will skyrocket and you will figure out how to get laid more consistently.
  5. The more specific the better – Especially if you want to get to really advanced levels as a pick up artist, it is absolutely imperative that you’re extremely specific about how you got laid. Lay reports are about more than just the words said. They are about how your night started out, your body language, logistics, her mental state… The list goes on and on.
  6. Write about off nights, too – Nobody is a superhero! We all have our off nights, and you (and your peers) can learn just as much from your mistakes as a pick up artist as your successes. Don’t be afraid to write about things that you did wrong. It doesn’t make you look weak; rather, it demonstrates that you are genuinely committed to change and learning how to get more consistently, which is baller as can be.

Following these simple guidelines will help you get 100% more out of your lay reports. Instead of wasting time writing meaningless and inaccessible jumbles of words, you can now make sure you write with intent and direction.

However, chronicling your crazy adventures as a pick up artist is only half of a bigger process…

No Substitute

While lay reports are great, there is no substitute for actually getting out there, meeting people, and getting more experience in the art of how to get laid. Although lay reports provide you with plenty of knowledge, knowledge is NOT power; rather, APPLIED knowledge is power.

Instead of resting on your laurels as a pickup artist, go infield with your favorite wing and make shit happen. But make sure that you remember the lessons from your most recent lay reports; always make sure to duplicate your successes and eliminate your mistakes.


If you’re doing well for yourself with women, and you want to go the extra mile, go onto the forums and leave comments on other people’s field reports. Give them props for what they did right, critiques on what you think they could do differently, and link them back to THIS article if it seems like they need a little bit of help getting their ideas down on paper.

No pick up artist is a true pick up artist unless his success can be replicated and his methods can be taught to other men. Test yourself. Test your knowledge and your skills by sharing your advice about how to get laid with other men and watching your success repeat itself through their eyes.

You won’t be disappointed.

And if you’ve tried putting yourself and your skills out there but you just can’t figure out what you’re doing wrong and why you’re not having the success you want, check out one of our world-famous pick up artist bootcamps today. We will kick your ass into dating shape!