How to Catch a Cougar and Master Post-Divorce Game

By JT Tran

With divorce rates at an all-time high, it is becoming more and more common for newly single men and women alike to get their mingle on. Whether you are still navigating the difficult emotions and figuring out how to deal with divorce, excited that you are newly single and looking for some dating advice, or are simply a cougar-chaser looking into cougar dating, divorce will affect your game, and it is important to learn about HOW to deal with divorce, so that you can adjust accordingly.

If you are recently divorced, researching and practicing social dynamics will definitely speed any emotional recovery that is still necessary, as well as vastly expand the options in not just your dating life, but your social life as a whole.

If you’re interested in cougar dating, there is a good chance that the cougars are divorced, and I can guarantee you that their divorce affected their psyche in one way or another. It is important to properly understand the effects that divorce might have if you want to successfully game them.

If you’re recovering from a divorce, exciting to start your new life, or just cougar-shopping, look no further brave traveller, because THIS… Is the guide to figuring out how to deal with divorce!

Coming From A Relationship

(If you are recently divorced or separated, this is the section for you. If you’re just cougar-hunting, feel free to skip on to the next section)

Coming from a relationship is all about HOW you look at it.

If you are excited to start on a new life, good for you! You’re already in the mindset required to start mingling again, and reading over this section will just serve to further re-enforce your enthusiasm for all of the new opportunities that you have.

If, however, you are still subdued and affected by the divorce, then you need to take the time to take care of yourself, and get yourself to where you mentally need to be.

While it might seem like divorce is all about negatives, there are TONS of positives that come with it. Let me drop some dating advice on you:

  1. Rediscovering yourself – When you are in a relationship, you compromise a LOT about yourself. You may have stopped hanging out with your exes, stopped going to your favorite spots, and stopped taking the time to do all of the things that you wanted to do. You need all the dating advice you can get because you’re RUSTY. Use your newfound freedom to start taking advantage of all that life has to offer again. Be free, reckless, and happy. Rediscover all of the old passions that you let fade as you were forced to compromise.
  2. Fuck monogamy! – You are now SINGLE! That’s incredible. While it is nice to have somebody to snuggle with, let’s face it: If you got divorced, it was probably for a good reason, and the happiness must not have been there anymore. Now that you’re single, not only are you free to fool around with whomever you want, but you may even meet a NEW special someone who will make you feel good in a way that your ex wasn’t able to at the end of your relationship.
  3. Lifestyle – When people are in a relationship, they have a tendency to neglect lifestyle in order to focus on the relationship. For instance, you might have been building a business, and, after you got married, you might have let it slack off a little bit. Being single again give you the opportunity to rekindle your masculine drive for success and create that dope lifestyle for yourself that you deserve.

These are just THREE of the reasons why leaving a relationship can be a positive event for you. As hard as it may be in figuring out how to deal with divorce, allow yourself to reframe the experience positively, so that you can learn from it. Yes, it is more than okay to have strong feelings about breaking up with the woman that you love(d), but there comes a point where you need to pick up the pieces and put the man that you used to be back together.

Getting Back Into Game

Once you’ve gotten a solid mindset, and you’re emotionally back on your feet, it is time to start integrating back into the dating scene.

It’s kind of like riding a bike; you’re never going to FULLY LOSE the game that you learned. However, if you’re rusty, it can definitely take some getting used to.

Here are some pieces of dating advice for getting back into it:

  1. Find a wing – This is crucial. Since you are on shaky ground, you need a guy who is going to help you push your limits. Hopefully, you maintained guy friends during your relationship. If that is the case, then just start going out with one of them.
  2. Become a regular – Start going to your old favorite place, or the new hot places. Become a regular. Show up at the same venues on the same nights every week. This will make things a lot easier for you because it allows you to have a firm commitment to keep to yourself, as well as offering the social proof that comes with being a regular.
  3. Build your social circle – Pretty straightforward.
  4. Take a bootcamp – If you want results NOW, and you just want to get right back into it full swing, your best (and fastest) bet is to take an ABCs of Attraction bootcamp to refresh your old skills.
  5. Your history DOESN’T MATTER! – In case you are at all self-conscious about your previous relationship status, DON’T BE! It seriously doesn’t matter. At all. No girl will find out until you are in deep comfort with them, and you won’t be in deep comfort with them until they already like you a lot as a person, so it really doesn’t matter at all.
  6. Don’t commit – Just have fun for a while. Don’t commit to any girls until you’re sure you are ready. After divorces, guys are generally too emotionally confused to make good decisions on this topic, so just hold off for a while to be safe.

Follow these 6 pieces of dating advice in rebuilding your game while figuring out how to deal with divorce. Do it. It is the fastest (and only) way to get back into the swing of things.

Dear Cougar Chaser,

This section is for you.

If you like older women and are interested in cougar dating, there is a HIGH PROBABILITY that a lot of the cougars you’ll hit on will end up being divorced.

While cougar dating is not much different, I’ll throw a few pieces of cougar dating advice your way, just so you have something to hang onto when you’re in the trenches.

  1. Don’t bring up age – Ignore the fuck out of any age difference that you might have. Sexy older women dress up and go out to venues because they want to feel young and desirable. While you like the fact that she’s older, there is something inherently feminine about youth that she needs to feel in order to feel sexy
  2. Dress the part – You’re not going to be successful with cougar dating unless you are wearing fitted, fashionable clothes. Period. These women have been around the block, and, especially if they’re hot, have probably dated millionaires, celebrities, etc. You can be 21, just don’t dress like you are.
  3. Direct, direct, direct – Women who are in their 30’s, 40’s and up KNOW WHAT THEY WANT. The also know what YOU want. They are extremely experienced and will more than certainly call you on any bullshit. They generally are more socially calibrated, AND have lower ASD’s. Make your motives clear. Don’t be sleazy about it, but certainly don’t hide the fact that you’re attracted to her. Women of this age appreciate honesty.

Simple, right?

Okay, maybe learning how to deal with divorce and navigating the cougar dating scene aren’t the easiest things in the world, but they’re definitely worth pursuing. If you’re the one who’s divorced, why should you deny yourself the incredible dating and sexual opportunities open to you now that you’re newly single? You shouldn’t. And if you like older women but you’re not sure how to deal with HER divorce, why should you deny yourself a stunning, experienced woman? You shouldn’t. So get out there, beef up your game, and don’t let divorce affect your life.

Of course, if you’re still unsure about how to deal with divorce and you’re looking for some more intense dating advice, check out one of our world-famous dating and seduction bootcamps, where we’ll make sure you get back into the game.