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 Post subject: Advice on AA
PostPosted: 12 Nov 2014, 13:29 
Hungry Ghost

Joined: 12 Nov 2014, 11:31
Posts: 1
So I signed up for the December SF bootcamp and I looked at the pre-bootcamp HW, which emphasized getting AA down to 7, ideally 4. As an honest assessment, I would say my AA on most days is 9+ and on my best days is like an 8.

It's at a point where, I just stop before I even start. That is to say, I don't even start feeling nervous, because I never even get that far. I just stop. I can't even hit the breaks because the engine never started. Even in situations, where I can't even give a good rationalization for not approaching, I just stop. When I catch myself doing (or not doing) this to myself, the mental self-beatdown generally makes it worse.

So is there any advice y'all have for making even incremental progress on AA. Like, should I have a friend take my wallet and not give it back until I talk to at least one person? Should I create a not-approach jar, where I put in a dollar each time this happens and have to give that money to a charity I don't support? Go running until I'm out of breath so I can't focus on my anxiety?

 Post subject: Re: Advice on AA
PostPosted: 12 Nov 2014, 17:42 
User avatar

Joined: 19 May 2010, 19:48
Posts: 164
Hey there,

Congrats on signing up and taking the first steps to make changes in regards to your dating life and specifically your AA. A great way to actually get over your approach anxiety is by actually approaching. I know it may seem hard but start by smiling and making eye contact with each and every person that you see. Just say hi! It is very low investment as well as socially expected that people will smile and say hi back.

When you come to bootcamp, you will learn how to formulate a conversation, work on approaching, and will be given the map of how to keep a conversation going. This will help you in many areas of your life including with women and in your professional life as well.

Please feel free to contact us anytime with more questions but many of your concerns will be mitigated by attending the bootcamp-so again, congrats!

<3 Sarah

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