http://www.abcsofattraction.com/blog/wh ... t-connect/“The Game is played in Comfort.”
– Erik von Markovik aka Mystery
The third of these phases is C: Comfort, Compliance & Connect.
You’ve opened the set and gotten her emotional using BT Spikes, but you know that this won’t last long, and you’re really interested in seeing what this girl is about. It’s time to go beyond the B-Phase, away from the joking (at least momentarily) otherwise you’ll end up a ZERO CALORIE HUMAN.
Sure you might seem interesting, but scratch the surface and you’re actually not giving real human warmth and interaction. Time to BE REAL and go into the C-Phase! Time to BE REAL and go into the C-Phase!
She seems fun, witty, and attractive… all the qualities you desire in a woman, but how do you get closer to her as a person?
The first stage of the C Phase is Compliance.
How do you truly know if she’s attracted to you? Many girls, especially the more beautiful ones who are socially experienced at the dating game, give off a lot of IOIs (Indicators of Interest). Not because they’re being a “cock tease”, but they understand they can get good reaction from men if they give off positive IOIs or seem flirty, outgoing and interested. But they doesn’t necessary mean they are…
In order to develop the ever-important masculine/feminine and leader/follower frame, General Compliance needs to be built up (more on Sexual Compliance in D Phase). This is the process of having her execute small tasks for you:
1) High-fives
2) Hand-shakes
3) Moving her over
4) Moving her around the club
5) Making her buy you a drink
6) Making her sit down with you
7) Etc
This, however, is not as difficult as it sounds and, if you are really paying attention, you’ll notice that isolating her and having her sit down with you are both compliance tests, however small. It takes Physical Confidence (a key component of this phase) in order to assert these little trials to gauge her interest.
All these leads up to making it more likely that she’ll emotionally invest into you and do larger things for you (for instance, letting you put her penis inside her).
The second stage of the C Phase is Comfort.
As it is wisely known throughout the community, “The game is played in comfort.”
Developing both Physical AND Emotional Comfort is the biggest and most important stage that requires compassion, intimacy, and Verbal Attraction (again, a key component of the phase).
There are many ways to do this but, first and foremost, sit down with her!
She’s been on those 4-inch heels and you wanted to isolate anyway, so why not make both of you physically comfortable?
After this tiny step has been taken, make her emotionally comfortable by talking about the things you are really interested in and that reflect who she is by asking Comfort Leading Questions such as:
“If you won $10,000,000 in the lottery, would you spend it? or would you do something with it?”
“If you could fly anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would you go and why?”
“What’s your story?”
The idea is build up emotional comfort, making her comfortable with you, and pair-bonding with her in order to make a longer lasting connection than simply running Flash Game in the B-Phase.
The last stage of the C Phase is Connect.
Now that we’ve used our Comfort Leading Questions to build comfort and various General Compliance Tests to gain compliance, we are ready to form a substantial bond between you and this beautiful woman.
We do this while allowing our true personality to shine through by using Intimacy Initiators. Some of these methods include discussing both your childhood and families, telling her stories about your vulnerabilities and letting her know you have your own standards by qualifying her. Using the Principle of Reciprocity, you want to elicit her values and stories from her as well so it’s an equal exchange of value.
Your Inner Strength comes into play by revealing truly deep and personal things about you as well as accepting her flaws, desires, and ambitions as your own. To qualify her by stating qualities you seek in a mate, not simply settling for the next woman simply because she indicated interest, but most importantly, STANDING BY YOUR CHOICES LIKE A MAN.
This portion of the seduction can extend anywhere from 30 minutes to 10 hours (!!), but time spent here is time spent in the most beautiful part of the game; building a connection.
If you’ve followed all these steps, you’ve gotten her emotional and made her feel comfortable with you, while building attraction through to an actual connection. At this point, you’re ready to show her you’re sexually interested in her (because you didn’t know until you built that connection, right?) and proceed to the D Phase (Dominant, DirectIntent & Disqualify), the subject of the next article!
