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ABOUT ME
I’m an average white dude from Seattle who escaped to LA. Seventy-five percent of my reasons were career related since comedy is my true love and I have a detailed background in improv, theater, sketch and writing. The other twenty-five can be credited to my psycho ex who gave me the worst case of “Oneitis” I’ve ever had. It’s surprising I didn’t build an altar of her and worship it in my basement.
Now, after a huge custody battle, my balls are back with me.
I work out six days a week, follow strict dieting habits, never smoke or use drugs and rarely drink. This bootcamp especially, was no exception. I wanted to bring my A-game and be able to remember every detail afterward.
My humor is pretty vulgar at times which probably leads to some conservative women running in the opposite direction. In addition to having thick skin and an open mind, I search for HB8’s and above.
And that brings me to why I chose to take this: because I want to talk to 10’s with the same I-don’t-give-a-shit confidence that I have around grenades. I wanted to be thrown out of my comfort zone and into the lion’s den, just like I was for my first comedy performance. Go big, or go home.
REVIEW
For me, it’s a sign that something is important when missing it, even partially, due to traffic triggers my road rage. June 3rd, my 28th birthday, was a prime example. Fortunately, fate was kind enough to sabotage the projector at the offices of JT Tran’s ABC’s of Attraction on Wilshire Blvd just long enough for me to arrive.
After finding parking and being greeted outside by Ozzie, the other instructor participating in the bootcamp, I enter only to realize I’m the only white guy.
“Am I even part of the demographic for this?” I thought.
Having printed out all of the PDF files from the Pre-Bootcamp webpage the night before and organizing it all in a three-ring booklet, I thought I was ahead of the curve. At least until an inch-thick textbook was handed to me. This thing was big enough to thwart off an attacker.
Scanning the room, I noticed nobody else dressed in clubwear which was asked of students to help instructors critique their fashion sense. Despite my lack of interest in changing my wardrobe after dropping nearly $1,500 on tuition for this thing, I still came to class with what I planned to wear that night.
Curriculum time. J.T. spoke to us with the energy we were expected to have around women. We addressed posture, kino turns, eye contact, openers, tonality, and stance among other things.
The storytelling was especially fun for me since I knew from my previous job as a salesman that I needed practice.
“You have a very small range, and although you use it well, it’s still a small margin” J.T. explained to me. All I could think of was the monotone voice of Ben Stein putting women to sleep faster than Roofalin.
Fast forward to our first night out. We end up going to the Edison in Downtown Los Angeles. Originally built in 1910 as LA’s first private power plant, it’s now a stylish venue giving attendees plenty of visual history and space to converse. I especially enjoyed that the music wasn’t loud enough to give you a migraine.
The students went to work. I applied what I learned ending the night with three number closes, two of which I was actually interested in seeing, and one of which responded.
Sets became easier and easier until my social proof soon had women eye-fucking me with the same stare I give to Lamborghinis when I see them drive by. “Quick question ladies” began flowing naturally on each approach.
Some might credit my energetic attitude to the fact that it was my birthday. I disagree, as the weekend prior I celebrated hard and didn’t get one phone number. Now I was armed with new perspectives.
We concluded the night at an Asian restaurant nearby with two separate tables. With only five students total, two instructors (J.T. Tran and Ozzie), and two wing girls, there was plenty of constructive criticism.
Saturday came and I was dragging my feet. Flu symptoms were kind enough to crash my party, and I had a comedy class to be at until 2pm, which meant I would be late a second time. Advil, 5hour Energy and GasX became the triple play against my drowsiness but didn’t do much.
In class we covered compliance testing, body language positioning, comfort, direct interest openers, and prerequisites for kissing and bringing women back to the VIP table.
Our venue that night was the Roxsbury in Hollywood. A great place, but not my cup of tea. Music loud enough to prevent conversations just makes the action pointless unless you can read lips. So the few sets I did open were out on the patio where I got to enjoy secondhand smoke.
That night I felt like shit, physically and mentally, and knew I could’ve done better had I not popped some Advil prior to coming out. My best result was a chick adding me on Facebook, while another classmate got laid.
The third day was shorter and I was on time. Flu symptoms subsided leaving me with a mildly sore throat. Topics of the day included AMOGs, extracting, escalating, a brief lecture on phone and text game and some last words of encouragement before our last night out.
The entire class enjoyed some lunch afterward and then dispersed for a few hours.
Our final meet-up was at the W Hotel. It was definitely a slow night, and with no sets that were all female, it was a perfect AMOG scene. I couldn’t avoid introducing myself to guys in each set I opened – they were everywhere.
This night was mediocre, with one number close and a terrific response by a model to my direct opener. Unfortunately, I did not outperform myself from the first night.
A breath-taking Jessica-Rabbit-ish singer with sexy back up dancers, Nick Simmons, and even Stevie Wonder all performed there in the lounge that night. However, the best entertainment for me was seeing Owen (aka Tyler Durden) of RSD show up with his students only to be kicked out shortly after by security for man-handling guests and staff. They use their “claw” method which is just another name for a noogie. It’s quite amusing to witness something like that fail on ugly women, let alone beautiful ones. Now I know why Strauss had such an easy time villainizing that guy in his book.
We migrated to Kitchen24 in Hollywood for our final meal and debrief before graduation. Although it took a while, we finally got a table that fit us all. It was a good meal and all of the instructors reminded me once again that I have far more potential with my improv, looks and funny nature. “This should come naturally to you” they told me.
Then we said our goodbyes after a one-of-a-kind three-day bonding experience. Few guys possess the humility to introspectively dissect themselves in private, let alone do it among peers. True respect goes out to those who’ve been through this.
All in all, the ABC’s Bootcamp was a terrific jumpstart for me. It took what I’ve retained from PUA-related literature and filled in the major gaps. My sticking points are crystal clear and I have already scheduled the first post-graduation meet up with one of my four classmates.
To Justin, Vince, Votha and Shizam: You guys are like frat brothers now. The benefit of living in so many different corners of the country is that we, as a group, have that many more stomping grounds to share. My home is your home whenever you’re in town, I just don’t want any involuntary kino turning while I’m sleeping! Don’t cross the pillow!
INSTRUCTORS
J.T. is a well-educated and bluntly honest teacher. If you want a Motherly figure who will apply a band-aid and kiss your wounds, then look elsewhere. He’s more the type to give you a swift kick in the ass. Observing him in the evening during the debrief was a riot. J.T. would alternate between the blunt Drill Sergeant, to the charming flirt as prospects passed by. And your harsh critiquing was temporarily paused while he hit on a 3 or 4 set. If your energy is low but your set is doing okay, he enters and BT spikes everyone. He pulls his own AND jumps on the grenade for his own students. Your success makes him happier than a fat kid with donuts.
My favorite J.T. quote from a conversation about a competitor: “I’d rather be like James Bond than Stiffler from American Pie”
As for Ozzie, he’s very soft-spoken and chooses his words well. He’ll be honest, he’ll swoop in and offer you a drink when you need advice in a set, and he’s a well-rounded guy who is just fun to kick it with. He winged for me on several occasions and made it a terrific weekend. Now I can agree with J.T. calling him the “smoothest Latino PUA”.
Gareth Jones, who wasn’t even at this bootcamp, still deserves an acknowledgement simply because his text-to-sex techniques work. If I had his skills, I could crash my car while texting and still be happy with what the future holds. I’ve already applied just a handful of his methods and yielded amazing results. One day the force will be that strong in me.
What can I say about the talented Wing Girl, Sarah Ann, that hasn’t been said in the countless online compliments I’ve already seen? She’s a lively addition to any social circle and glows when she smiles. She’ll even laugh at my toilet humor. Hopefully she stays around at least long enough for the first 1 year reunion of my class, but it’s understandable that a girl of her class will eventually lose confidence in the male race if she has to deal with too many novice Casanovas.
Heather is terrific too. She’s been a writer for the ABC’sOA for a while but experienced her first bootcamp the same time I did. I foresee that blonde & blue hair becoming her wing girl trademark. Entering sets felt even more comforting knowing if I forgot what to say, I could just point to Heather’s smile to woo the crowd.
Any questions, just PM me.
The_Jester
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