Refecltions on two years post-bootcamp

Awesome work, Dougie.

Right now, I am a newbie to the community and am EXACTLY where you were two years ago, so I know how you felt.

I have several questions for you. These are mainly to help me calibrate my expectations to be realistic and see any sticking points as they come up. I'd really appreciate it if you could answer them.

- Exactly how many pulls and makeouts do you have so far?

- How long after you started did it take you to get better? (Basically, number of nights out to first make out, first pull etc). I ask because I wanna know how long your beginners hell was.

- How many makeouts or pulls in a month do you get now?

- I know you're in an LTR right now, but if you were not, do you think you would be able to get pulls & makeouts with any regular certainty? (IOW, are you still "getting lucky" or do you have enough skill now to make it happen more or less on demand?)

- Every person's journey is going to be different, but do you have any tips for the noobs out there? Anything that you know now that you wish somebody had told you when you first started out?

Thanks!

Hey Shadow,

If I think hard enough, I could give a blow-by-blow (no pun intended), but I don't know if that would help you. When they say everyone's different, that's not a cliche. Everyone comes from completely different backgrounds, and will find that they have certain strengths and weaknesses when they get out into the field. Some guys have the confidence and don't know how to direct it, other guys have all of the direction but none of the confidence.

If you look at the other posts here, there are guys who pull during the bootcamp or a week later. Then there are guys who never make any progress, at all, after the bootcamp and just go back to their AFC lives. Compared to that first set of guys, I'm still a noob. Compared to second set of guys, I'm a master PUA

You're basically going to have to get yourself out there to see what your strengths and weaknesses are, and see what you want out of it. From there, you'll find out that there are things out there you thought wanted, but don't. On the flipside, there's things out there you thought you never wanted, but do.

You've got to put yourself out there in the first place to find out what works for you and what doesn't. I can tell you stories about girls that I could have f-closed but chose not to, and I can tell you stories about women I should have gone after, but didn't realize it until it was too late.

The point is that my journey is my own, and yours will be too if you decide to keep up with it.

But that is a good question I forgot to answer. My thing would be, work to identify what's really holding you back, because flashy clothing and memorized lines aren't going to do it alone.

For me, it was real simple things. I had bodyweight issues and issues with my cleanliness at home. These were issues I swept under the rug in my own mind for about a year after the bootcamp, not really addressing, because it was tough to think about. It was tough to face some facts and admit I had issues with my own discipline, but once I did, I was able to conquer them and start working on those. These are things that no bootcamp, set of DVD's, or PUA books can teach you.

Someone else I've been out with a lot told me he had trouble transitioning into the comfort stage with women. For the longest time, I thought it was because he had trouble with his wording when talking to women, but he later identified the real issue. He said that going into comfort requires you to open up about yourself, and that's what he has trouble doing. He can joke and make small talk all night long, but for him to actually open up about something in his life, he has real issues with that. And it took him a real long time after to discover that about himself.

So I'd say really explore yourself, your thoughts that are really uncomfortable to think about, and work those out as best you can. They'll always hold you back otherwise.