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 Post subject: One on One with Kevin
PostPosted: 12 Dec 2009, 08:14 
Fury Apprentice

Joined: 16 Aug 2008, 05:30
Posts: 52
Location: NYC BC Sept 08
As a part of the long term coaching, I had this second bootcamp, a week ago, with Kevin Feng. Day 1 started with Kevin asking me about what exactly is that I want to get out of this. Being able to verbalize my goals gave me some confidence. Since this was one on one, the bootcamp was very interactive. The first night, we reviewed goals, a couple of stories and openers. My stories lacked emotion. I have always been clueless about how to say things succinctly and yet be able express emotions. Kevin helped me re-frame my stories to put life in it. I have to mention that I asked a billion questions and Kevin would answer each one of them patiently. Voice projection is something I had issue with. Kevin gave me few tips on that and he had me practice talking in a very loud environment. On day 1, in the first nightclub we went to, I approached about 8-9 sets. I do have approach anxiety but there is something within me which says "do it" and then the next thing I hear in my mind is "you have already taken the step....you can't go back....just deliver the opener and if they respond, well and good. If they don't...move on". I would do A & B and while I still struggled with C, I approached every set Kevin would point out. The whole time, Kevin would patiently listen to what I would say to my sets, would watch my body language and note the mistakes I made. We then went to a lounge and I opened 4 more sets here. There were few sets which in the beginning took interest in me but then I botched them because I would continue making the mistakes. These are mistakes, I would have never realized and small as they might seem, Kevin pointed out, it makes a huge difference in the game. At night, Kevin chalked out 5 things that I need to correct. One of them, my smiling issue, is something which has no easy fix but Kevin made me stand in front of the mirror and I rehearsed possible smile types.

Thanks to Kevin, I think I have found a style that works better for me. Everyone has their own style; JT's being direct/super nice and overpowering, Gareth's I think is more artistic and full of banter stacked one after another, William's I have read as being rigorous. After observing and listening to Kevin's critique, it seems to me that an indirect, sideways approach works better for me than approaching the sets face on with a huge smile (I was doing this previously). Kevin went in depth on why my sets were not hooking. On day 2, we started with these 5 things and practiced one by one on how to avoid my sticky points. Learned more about banter and a particular kind of banter. Kevin showed me examples that I should learn from. I had no good natural opener. Kevin and I spent time in converting one of my natural openers into a better opener. Then, we did some brainstorming to come up with fun little stories. He emphasized the need to have unique and fun stories that would make me stand out. We discussed 3 stories from my life and converted it into fun facts. These were going to be my arsenal for day 2. Its snowing outside and its extremely cold. In normal circumstances, there was no way I would even think of going out. However, the coach pushed me : ) and I had to. We get a redbull and I am freezing to death as I didn't have any jacket on me. I didn't have much options as far as jackets are concerned. Girls suck the cold and still go out in skimpy outfits in dead cold. Why can't I was the question. Kevin rephrased that and put it to me in a way, that I said to myself, why can't I. This is hardcore training now. haha After we went out on day 2, I began to open with my natural opener. I practiced the body language aspect Kevin had point out, calibrated my smile. I approached about 8 sets that night. First 5 were really exhausting because my voice projection isn't good and speaking loud and still not being loud takes more energy than speaking loud and being loud. Kevin made me practice voice projection infield. For all my sets, I noticed difference between the night before and then right away. Sets were more receptive. Only in one set I got rejected right away. Others out of those 5 were curious about me. Of course my game had A and B down but then C onwards it was anything and everything I could possibly say. Sometimes good things come out of my mouth, sometimes lame things come out of my mouth. Yeah even the lame things are spontaneous. We sat down to take a break and Kevin cheered me up like a big brother does. At that point I really felt, I have a great friend looking out for me and constantly trying to correct my mistakes. Then, I approached 3 more sets. They were receptive. The last one being an Asian set. I am not a big fan of Asian sets but as Kevin explained, when you are having fun, you gotta talk to everybody and not look like searching for HBs. I dont want to describe all the sets but I will describe this last one. So I open to this Asian set and they are dancing/moving on the floor. I deliver my opener and put my fun little story forward. The heart of the story was that I was a local singer back home. When I say that, not every girl says, "sing for me" but a 2 out of 8 will. This set asked me to sing. I used it as an excuse to extract both of them to a quieter place and we sat down on the couch. This was the script Kevin gave me and according to the script I had to sing in Hindi. In that night club loud with English songs, in my fancy dress, I sang to those girls......in Hindi. They loved it. Anything is possible. I start gaming them both. At some point of the conversation my bantering went to a ridiculous extent and no matter what I said she would laugh it away. Me: You are a total slut! She: Hahahaha. I push her away and then pull her back. Later I ask for a kiss (ABC kiss close). She would not give a kiss and she would not even leave. Then I went for the Mystery Kiss close. Again, she would not kiss. Then we exchange numbers and I thought there is no point in lingering around and I should leave the set. As I started to walk away she stood on her toes and kissed me on the cheek. I smiled, I left. At night Kevin told me what I did right, what I did wrong. Voice projection being one big issue. The louder you are the more intonation you have in your voice, the more expressive you are and your body language adapts accordingly. So voice projection is the key.

Day 3, we talked more about B. Kevin described some simple tactics that I should be using to pump BT. As I understand and Kevin says, it is only when everything comes together as a package, a pick up artist is born. Fashion is also an integral part of it. The nightclubs here are mostly dead on Sundays; Many of them even closed. Kevin discussed a few fashion pointers and we decided later on to go to the mall and do some shopping for me. We had never been to this mall and didnt know what to expect but as I learned, that's not the ideal place to go to for pick-up clothes. We went to a store. Kevin picked up shirts for me that I should try. I tried them one by one and after listening to Kevin's comments I picked up a nicer one. This is going to be my pua clothing. Another aspect that Kevin emphasized was working out. He mentioned that clothes fit you better and there are certain aspects of your body that women look at first. These are what I need to build. He gave me a workout routine. I still have to sign up for gym. Humor is again a very important aspect which he said will become natural once you start learning from other people. My vocabulary sucks so I have to work on that part. I am aware I am one of the toughest students to teach to. I have an accent and I am not white. A raging nightclub is like a battlefield for me. However, Kevin mentioned everything can be overcome and that I don't have to avoid or be sad about being who I am. I can still be who I am....but turn myself into a fun and unique "who I am". This is something very important that I never thought anyone would believe in.

In all I felt that Kevin was very friendly, answered my every question whether in-field or off-field. He criticized my every move, gave tips on how I should have done it and what I did wrong, discussed personal details that are probably beyond the syllabus of any coaching. Honestly I have reached the point where now when I go out and I don't have a wing, I can hear a voice in my head telling me - " 2 set go approach!". Its my coach and as soon I hear it, I know I have to approach.

To sum it up, I would not have expected anything more than what I learned from this coaching session with Kevin. Great experience, plenty to learn and plenty to work on. My game has gone from canned openers and routines to natural openers. I can now see the sets being more receptive than they were before. Being able to feel comfortable with who I am has given me more confidence than ever before. I have never looked at pick up in this way before. In my head it was always- I have to be James Bond right from the beginning. Now I have a different view and as I see it, it is more fun than before because I can enjoy telling stories I really know! rather than trying to be some one else from a script.

I have number closed a polish girl just last night and I tried to implement things that Kevin told me. I have dated another girl last Tuesday and we are going out this Sunday. I have 2 more phone numbers that I never called (I can't explain why). I bet I see some progress....Its slow but its something. At least I am now not where I was before I started with this program. Kevin was probably more exhausted than me after the session. I whole heatedly thank my coach.

To people who are thinking of making a difference in their life, I would say ABCs of Attraction has best instructors who have been in your shoes. Having so much variety in their styles but being able to follow the same structure (ABCDEF) is just beyond amazing. Kevin was extremely patient and you can ask him anything and everything. Kevin did give up every ounce of his energy and for that I am so very grateful because I do honestly see myself as more of a man than I have ever been. This is not pick-up, this is not game, this is the style of life in this modern society. If you don't adapt to it, you die. That's truth. As an Indian out of a rural village in some bumble-fuck corner in India, being able to come to the US and have this ultimate confidence is more than gold. I have an accent, I am a skinny brown dude and as I said I do realize I am THE toughest student to teach to (yeah am not dumb to not realize that...at least I am educated). I find ABCs of attractions structure easy to remember and follow. It is a beautiful thing : ) as you will realize when you do learn it.

- Flash


Last edited by flash on 14 Dec 2009, 20:24, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: One on One with Kevin
PostPosted: 12 Dec 2009, 13:01 
Sage

Joined: 25 Nov 2009, 12:18
Posts: 77
Location: NYC
yo flash, i've read some of your FR's before, and it does sounds like you've been struggling for a while, but stick with it man, as i keep reading your FR's it's sounding like you're making steady progress not just in your the actions in your outings but also in your tone and attitude when you write these. i think that comfort and confidence is definitely noticed by women (even if only in a subconscious level) so keep it up man.


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 Post subject: Re: One on One with Kevin
PostPosted: 13 Dec 2009, 19:25 
Fury Apprentice
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Joined: 24 Jun 2008, 13:24
Posts: 851
Location: Ann Arbor, MI
Bootcamp Graduate: YES (BC: Los Angeles, June 2008)
Hey brother,

It was awesome coaching you, understand that it was a lot of work and a giant uphill battle for you the entire weekend, but that's how it is for everyone including myself. Just got your text that you're on a date tonight which is AWESOME, glad to see you're getting results not even a week after you program.

I'm really ecstatic to see that you're taking off and if there's one thing I'd ascribe it to, it's your attitude, you've taken everything that we've taught you and you've been using it verbatim without deviating from the plan. We're glad to have you as a success story for the time being and I'm definitely excited to read your future field reports.



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 Post subject: Re: One on One with Kevin
PostPosted: 14 Dec 2009, 20:22 
Fury Apprentice

Joined: 16 Aug 2008, 05:30
Posts: 52
Location: NYC BC Sept 08
TL2, I appreciate your suggestions man. Its true, gotta stick with it. Kevin, thanks again for all the awesome knowledge. I have a new view about things. Things I would never say but now I can. Its ridiculous and so much fun to even think that I could do these things or even be able to express myself in a way I have learned during this bootcamp. Thanks again brother.

- Flash


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