Sticking Points 5 months post BC

I have to say since I joined the ABCs community with the pre-BC assignments, my life has changed dramatically for the better. It shows in the numbers too. I've doubled the number of girls I've fucked and more than doubled the number of girls I've made out with. At first I thought I was looking for a relationship, but I realized that it's not time for that now. I'm still really young (23) and I need to live life first. I'm still running into a lot of sticking points though, and unfortunately these are the same sticking points I came into the BC with.

1) Laziness-I just don't go out enough, and when I go out, I approach 0-1 sets because I'm with my friends (I know not an excuse). This kind of stems from the fact that I had pretty low goals coming into the BC. My goals were to be able to carry a conversation well when in set and have more hook ups (making out) than I had before. Also, I wanted to be seen as a sexual being by people I meet and people I normally interact. Check, check, and check. I am happy that I reached my goals, but I need to create new ones. ?? Maybe fuck a girl from every race? (I only have Latina, is that a race?, and half white/latina) Aim to get a kiss close every night? Or don't be outcome dependent, approach 10 sets each night I go out?

2) Not pushing the interaction enough. Last weekend was a perfect example. So I was at a bar with some classmates and there was a cute latina resident sitting by herself, so I opened her up, sat down and talked to her. Her body language was pretty closed to me, as we were talking probably about 10-15min? She opened up a little bit (still closed). I put in some light kino on her arm, but she didn't reciprocate at all. I also had my arm behind her (not touching) and I occasionally touched her back for emphasis. She was engaged for the most part to the convo, but still no IOIs. After just writing that, I realized, what I needed to do CTs! A good CT would be to do the Pillsberry Dough boy routine. I could have asked her to go to another part of the bar with me. Maybe tell her to play pool with me? I also needed to BT spike. High Five? Paper, rock scissor routine?

3) Skipping out of set too early. I'm always aware, probably too aware, of when I've overstayed my welcome. I'm not sure what to do about that since I do believe that if the set is going poorly, stop wasting your time and jump out. I'd like to come in strong and stay strong, instead of dropping below the fuckable line and then working my way up. I dunno???

4) This ties in with number 1, but I've definitely re-developed some of my AA. Stop being outcome dependent and the sets are practice, not the end all be all of my life. If a girl rejects me after 1 minute, it means it's due to just probability, it's a numbers game, or I didn't stick my Approach well enough, and I just need to work on that.

Open to suggestions and advice, my fellow ABCers!

When you first start out --- just opening sets gets rid of your AA and it feels like a real high BUT --- if you are just not hooking or not getting results then your AA returns. For example: when I started out and did my first 40 some sets I felt good but once I hit 60 and not getting anywhere -- then I realized something is wrong with my game in general...since I kept on getting the same results.

On the one hand I felt good that I opened say 50 sets but on the other hand I only got 1 number and that makes my average 2% success rate Then to make things worse --- that number was a flake. I figured out there things I was repetitively doing wrong and that really --- if I kept at it --- I will have a 2% success rate...no wonder AA will return.

One PUA said that if a certain routine is not working after 3 tries --- he'll go back to the drawing board and get something new --- which makes total sense.

After reading what you posted --- remember that you can "boomerang" back to a set. Do not think that you open then stay in that set the rest of the night and "sticking" to it. Instead ---- leave the set while you are on a high note....let them a have a breather...then come back later on. Even non-PUA's just chat up a bit on the first meeting then they bump into the set again and then deliver more stuff and few minutes later in the evening. You might even remember this as a "take-away" or roll-off (not the same of ejecting out entirely).

These days, after some more experience, I routinely do a boomerang...works much better.

Also learn how to pick your sets. No sense on opening on girls who are deep in conversation and drama or just who came from a funeral. Another PUA once said that if a girl does not look openable then she is not! Simple as that. Opening on sets like that will just bring your average down and blow your inner game.

Hopefully you realize that people telling you just to open on anything ---- that it is just an initial training technique. Hopefully after a while you learn to develop a radar as to what to open and when. For example --- you'll find a group of women in a bachelorette party hard to open/close but you might find a female 2 set easier to open/close.

I've developed a very good radar of when to open a set and when not to. I can do it casually and open well with an observation opener. It's now just a part of my daily life that it's just not a big deal when I do them. This is a good and bad thing. The good is that conversation and opening just flows naturally, the bad is that I'm not really pushing myself and challenging myself with direct openers and such. My goal is a stable steady relationship with a beautiful woman, which I still haven't found yet. So it's great that I'm a good opener and I know who to open and how to open and that I can basically talk about anything, but since I'm still not at my goal, I need to push myself further.

I'm going to put up my sticking points and places I want to get better with women just for my own goals and purposes.

Sticking points
1.10 game - it's hard to have the courage to talk to super hot girls
2. Social Awkwardness - I don't want other people to hear what I'm saying
3. Two-Sets in the Day time
4. Attraction
5. Phone Game

Locations
1. Beach
2. Gym
3. Grocery Stores
4. Coffee Shops.

Any advice?

The advice I'm about to give are all things I should implement as well, but I know they are the basics that anyone in the community. Nothing makes up for experience. All your sticking points can be overcome by practice out in the field, which encompasses more than just times when you are out to "game." It means practicing storytelling, cracking jokes, and developing rapport with co-workers, neighbors, random people you meet in the elevator, waitresses, etc. Every social interaction is a chance to practice the skills that the ABCs have taught you. Be mindful of what people like and what people don't like. Gauge people's interactions to jokes and stories you tell. Every moment of every day is a chance to find the girl you want. The girl of your dreams is out there, all you have to do is approach her.

Specifically with regards to awkwardness. I used to have a problem with social awkwardness, but I overcame it when I realized that, I have nothing to be ashamed of. I used to think, "Oh I'm hitting on this girl, what do all these people think," which is bullshit thinking. Yes I am hitting on the girl, it may or may not work out, it's great if it does, it's okay if it doesn't. I notice a lot of guys, especially Asian guys act awkward because they think they are doing something inappropriate or something other people will make fun of them for. Whatever you do, own it and accept it. That way if someone teases you for hitting on that girl or doing whatever. You take ownership of your actions because there's nothing wrong with doing what you're doing.

I have to say since I joined the ABCs community with the pre-BC assignments, my life has changed dramatically for the better. It shows in the numbers too. I've doubled the number of girls I've fucked and more than doubled the number of girls I've made out with. At first I thought I was looking for a relationship, but I realized that it's not time for that now. I'm still really young (23) and I need to live life first. I'm still running into a lot of sticking points though, and unfortunately these are the same sticking points I came into the BC with.

1) Laziness-I just don't go out enough, and when I go out, I approach 0-1 sets because I'm with my friends (I know not an excuse). This kind of stems from the fact that I had pretty low goals coming into the BC. My goals were to be able to carry a conversation well when in set and have more hook ups (making out) than I had before. Also, I wanted to be seen as a sexual being by people I meet and people I normally interact. Check, check, and check. I am happy that I reached my goals, but I need to create new ones. ?? Maybe fuck a girl from every race? (I only have Latina, is that a race?, and half white/latina) Aim to get a kiss close every night? Or don't be outcome dependent, approach 10 sets each night I go out?
Laziness is not a sticking point it's a bad habit. The only way to get over it is to say fuck what your friends think and make the approach, or just go out with out them. Another way would be to get some wings who are going out with the same purpose as you. When we watch other men go for what we want, it makes us want to compete and will make you start sarging. When there is a will there is a way, trust me when you want something bad enough you will get off your lazy ass and go get it.

2) Not pushing the interaction enough. Last weekend was a perfect example. So I was at a bar with some classmates and there was a cute latina resident sitting by herself, so I opened her up, sat down and talked to her. Her body language was pretty closed to me, as we were talking probably about 10-15min? She opened up a little bit (still closed). I put in some light kino on her arm, but she didn't reciprocate at all. I also had my arm behind her (not touching) and I occasionally touched her back for emphasis. She was engaged for the most part to the convo, but still no IOIs. After just writing that, I realized, what I needed to do CTs! A good CT would be to do the Pillsberry Dough boy routine. I could have asked her to go to another part of the bar with me. Maybe tell her to play pool with me? I also needed to BT spike. High Five? Paper, rock scissor routine?

Start asking yourself why you are doing what you are doing and see if there is a purpose behind this. I say this because I want you to start thinking about the courtship model that we teach at abc's and start to figure out where all the pieces of the puzzle fit.

Here is an excersise, since you asked for it I am going to give you a drill I learned from a mentor, the moment you see a girl you are attracted to and you approach her, you have to stay in that set until you get some sort of close. Even harder is to open and fuck the girl that you opened, you basically will stay in till you fuck. Start opening sets and going for broke, this will get you over your fear of escalating.

3) Skipping out of set too early. I'm always aware, probably too aware, of when I've overstayed my welcome. I'm not sure what to do about that since I do believe that if the set is going poorly, stop wasting your time and jump out. I'd like to come in strong and stay strong, instead of dropping below the fuckable line and then working my way up. I dunno???

4) This ties in with number 1, but I've definitely re-developed some of my AA. Stop being outcome dependent and the sets are practice, not the end all be all of my life. If a girl rejects me after 1 minute, it means it's due to just probability, it's a numbers game, or I didn't stick my Approach well enough, and I just need to work on that.
Open sets for no other reason than to become talkative and have fun. Start saying to yourself before you open, "I don't give a shit!". This is going to help you relax, remember as JT says you don't know if you like her yet until she has something you should be attracted to her for.

Open to suggestions and advice, my fellow ABCers!