How to talk about sex without sounding too horny

How do i talk about sex with an asian girl without sounding too horny?

I have read JT's blog about the D-phase and haven't tried the "too dirty" sentences yet. The reason is that I am afraid that i might sound too horny and they might not even see me as "friend" or boyfriend the next time we meet. They might think i am a rapist. Talking about sex is kind of risky, especially when i am in a date with asian girls.

The asian girls I have been gaming are somewhat traditional and they like family, etc.. I don't think their parents talk about sex with them. If i use the sentence from JT's blog- "Are you submissive in bed?", they will clearly see me as a rapist.

So you know any sentences that are not too "sexy" or "dirty"?

I know a few and have tried it + reactions

Me - "Do you prefer chocolate covered strawberry or whipped cream"?
her - euuh Why did you ask me this?? + ** expression of shock ***


Me - "When was your first kiss?"
her - "None of your business. Its kinda private" + "eyes suspicious"

Any help on other examples of similar sentences where you had a better reaction than the above?

At some point you must express direct sexual interest. You cited examples of where you spoke in a sexual manner and got "negative" reactions and you worry they will think you are a rapist.

First of all, unless you are physically dominating her without her consent, making a statement such as that, in my opinion does not constitute sexual assault/make you a rapist in her eyes. All you did was make a sexual statement and/or question. This does not make you a rapist and you should not think that the girl will think you are. In both of those examples did the girl scream "rapist"? Did she try to fight you off? Or did she just have a negative reaction? I'm willing to bet she just had a negative reaction, but did not call you a rapist, or think you were one. Also, there are plenty of ways to express sexual interest if you don't like the "submissive" question.

I believe those statements/questions are fine but I think you may need more comfort. Did you initiate any compliance tests? If so did she pass? Only then would you really move onto D, I think. If she didn't pass, don't stop gaming her. A negative reaction doesn't necessarily mean "no," assume it means "not now" or "not yet" unless the girl makes it clear to you that she is not interested in you in a romantic way (i.e. verbally states it). Fractionate between B, C until she passes your compliance tests, don't forget that you need solid comfort and as far as I understand, Asian girls, especially the more traditional ones will need more comfort until they are comfortable with you being sexual.

It sounds like you want to play it safe and hopefully can still keep her as a "friend" if you fail in D-phase. I think you just need to put your balls on the line. In D-phase you either make it or break it... you have to be prepared to risk losing her, so sack up! Do or do not, there is no try!

Hey Mike,

I think some Asian girls might be hard to game because the Asian race in general is socially behind the curve. As the alumni learned from their respective bootcamps, this is much more of a problem for the males than the females. However, there are definitely some issues for the females as well.

In my observation, the ABCs model assumes that the female is sufficiently socially adept to pass compliance tests and discuss sexual topics. Some girls are just uncomfortable talking about sex with anybody or being put through a compliance test, and most of these girls are probably Asian. I don't have any data to back this up unfortunately, but in my short experience with pickup, Asian girls tend to lack the social skills or social comfort to do some of these things.

If the girl is a fob or if she lived a sheltered childhood, then I feel she's just suffering from the same negative social programming that many Asian males face.

Sincerely,

Jinjo

I agree with Rockefeller there in that it sounds like you are miscalibrating, saying your words wrong, not really in the right phase etc. This is a difficult one because it requires some experience to tell where she is at and what she is feeling, etc.

I can see what you are trying to do is to talk about sex and hopefully turn her on and separate yourself from the other guys and change her perception of you and so on. It is tricky and quite an art if you want to talk to her about sex.

I think the statements you made about the whipped cream and the first kiss thing are pretty safe…at least when it comes to White girls.

I have never talked about sex before making out with the girl. If I feel she is in the right mindset --- I escalate to playing with her hair then going in for a kiss then escalating more. In most cases we were just watching a movie/TV, walking etc…then we start touching/escalating then go into full make-out.

However, if you want to talk to her about sex (and play it safe) then try talking about it in the third person. For example:

“I read a study where 80% of women prefer chocolate covered over whipped cream.” then leave her to comment.

“My friend Linda says most of her friends had their first kiss in high school.”

“Did you know that according to a recent study that 15% of couple actually participate in regular anal sex?!”

The trick here (in talking about studies and third person) is that you are talking about sex BUT it is not involving her. Kinda a chicken way out.

Personally, I don’t even talk about sex… When you start talking too much you will screw yourself up. If you have her really attracted then you can simply start making out.

I don't have any experience with Asian Girls but I would guess sex is a universal language where as "talking" is not.

Hey mikedota, when you interact with the girl when going from C-phase to D-phase you already have this mentality that things are going to go bad when you start talking about sexual things with the girl... and you know what's strange... for some strange reason, women can sense that negative mentality no matter how hard you try to hide it. When a man thinks that way, he gives off this vibe that says, "oh shit she is going to feel awkward when I start asking her if she prefers a hot shower or a warm bath!" Trick yourself into thinking that nothing's gonna go wrong and that she will comply. I know... easier said than done... but just think positive.

When going from C to D, just talk slower and deeper. From my experience, you can ask the dumbest question and by saying it slower and deeper while looking in her eyes it can sound sexual to her. It's just the way you say it. I tried gaming an asian girl and with a very slow and deep tone and experimented by asking her the dumbest questions and giving the dumbest most sarcastic answers. For example, when it came to career I said something dumb like, "I want to be a professional lion tamer. Have a stool in one hand and a whip on the other. I have this thing for whips... I love working with whips." Say it in a slow sexual way. I had this mentality that I was just fuckin' with her so if she were to call me out for being a horn dog or whatever, I would just say something like, "What?! Did you think... oh shut up... get you're mind out of the gutter. I'm not that easy!" Just have a quick comeback in the back of your head if she calls you out. Then continue talking slow and deep. lol.

I think the best thing to do is to just talk slower and deeper once you think it's time for D-phase. Play with it and just talk about regular stuff. I think that's the best transition from C to D. So it feels like you're still in C but really you're warming her up to D. That's how I do it. I think you can make almost anything sound sexual when you say it in a deep and slow tone while looking at her in the eyes. And if she calls you out or whatever, just be like, "What? It was an innocent question." Because the question was innocent, but the way you said it wasn't. lol. If she complies with you as you are talking to her in a deep and slow way, then casually get to those sexual questions/topics. If she still give you a hard time or says something mean then leave her and brush it off. She's just weird. Like I always say, bitch is crazy!

Thanks everyone for their awesome answers. I will definitely work on the compliance tests next time. Its hard to remember to do those
compliance tests while in full conversation. Anyways, thanks for reminding me to do compliance tests before entering the D-phase. Speaking slowly works as well, and i believe I should speak slowly all the time, not very slow, but slow enough for people to understand me clearly.

I have researched some compliance tests and practiced some and i believe the Hi5 test is the easiest to do on an asian girl. Now for the more direct compliance tests (in the D-phase),

- kiss on the cheek (after telling her she is very beautiful)
- hand holding (after lots of kino)

if she passes both of the above, I believe it the best time to go for the french kiss, and then if she does it, its the green light to talk about sexual topics.

I know its logical, like a computer program but anyways, feel free to use this and add some more experiences, especially with asian girls because I'm kind of gaming on a few asian girls right now.

You're clearly uncomfortable talking about sex. As long as you're comfortable with it, she's comfortable with it. You need to be able to talk about the wildest sex acts as though you're talking about the weather. she will realize she can tell you anything. (and you have to be someone she can say anything to)

Did you say it with a smile and with eye contact?

I don't often use sexual lines right away, however, I do cut into them quicker than most guys I know. Often whenever I get a god honest negative reaction, I just follow up with a break in rapport. IE

ME: "Do you like it doggie or missionary?"

HB: "Why are you asking me that?" *obviously put off*

ME: "OH-MY-GOD! Yesterday...(enter story)..."

But, then again, I don't usually open Asian women very often.

Another thing is, DO YOU MEAN IT?

I've learned that when I 'go' sexual and don't feel that sexual vibe, my sexual escalation doesn't work (verbal or physical). When I feel like I want to take that girl into the back alley to do things to her that would land me in a Turkish prison and focus that 'feeling' into the interaction, the feedback is far more positive.

Love doesn't always result in great sex, and certainly, otherwise very happy couples have problems with sex sometimes. And sex without love can be extremely wonderful with the right partner. It's a matter of your lover knowing the right ways to touch you and appeal to you. Love certainly helps, in that the whole brain chemistry and bonding things are working with the touching and everything else. However, I've known people who said they can't have good sex with someone they loved, and that it had to be with someone they didn't have those feelings for. Some people say the best sex they've had is with people they weren't in love with. I think it varies and depends on the person.

However, like I said, I think your situation is also that you've found someone who's sexual skills match your sexual desires. Some people who don't have great sex at first, can have great sex if they're both willing to learn to do what pleases the other sexually. Talk about Sex