Big D wrote:
Lots of comfort building, DHV stories - I've lived all over the world so got lots of stories to tell, and I'm kind of good at making spontaneous jokes, so she's laughing alot. We had drinks for happy hour, then bounced to a restaurant. I've been kinoing all the time - just touching arms and stuff like that - nothing heavy. We've been together for a couple of hours and we're sitting opposite each other and I move to hold her hand, and she holds it back - great. Then she says 'You've got a lot to offer, haven't you' So I respond in a cocky funny way 'mm I know!' She laughs but pulls her hand away, and doesn't comply any more the whole rest of the date - I try holding her hand again a few times but she pulled away again, I asked her if she'd like to have another drink with me and she replied ' i have to go and see a friend in Brooklyn' - pretty obviously a fabricated bail out excuse, triedthe elephant when we left the restaurant, kissing her at the subway, but she turned her cheek. Nothing. She was still pleasant the whole time, but no kino compliance so pretty sure I crashed and burned.
Anyone got any advice? Perhaps I need to be more asserive/dominant when going into D.
Do you think I should call her/ text her/ email her? Or just let it go?
I think I'm making some progress - seem to be doing well in B and C when I get there, but still pretty rubbish at A, and not going anywhere in D.
Cheers..
Anyway, going to the Gansevoort tonight, so hopefully will break through some barriers there..
Whats up D!
Looks like the turning point was after you made your statement of " mm I know".
There could be many reasons as to why she acted ( changed her mood) the way she did. I want to focus on your actions that lead to her reaction.
- If she is a confident mature women ( not a party girl in her early 20s) she might be looking for something serious. If that is the case her statement was meant to gauge if you were in the same boat as her.
- Sounds like she pushed the interaction (or attempted) into some deep comfort and you pulled it waaayyy back into the attraction phase by going cocky funny. Slight miscalibration there.
- She gave you a sincere compliment and you didn't acknowledge it. You didn't recognize that she has taken the time to notice something about you that she appreciates or admires.
* remember if your compliance test fails do not attempt the same one over and over. Switch it up if hand holding fails, next time try sticking your elbow out and having her latch on.
