how do you become an approach machine?

Hey brothers, I really need your help.

I've realized that this is my NUMBER ONE barrier to getting good at game, and I'm sure many others can relate/will benefit from the answers to this because 90% of community guys I've met are like this (or even worse). During most of my field sessions, i'll do a set, but afterwards it's really hard for me to immediately dive into another set. i'll usually end up hanging out with my wing or, if he's not there, walking around for a bit trying to get myself to do other sets. I always tell myself that next time I'll just go from set to set to set but it's so much easier said than done. It'll usually be like 5-10 minutes before I manage to get myself to do another set, and to make it even worse, I get more nervous because so many girls have seen me walking around or looking for other sets to do (I know I'm supposed to look occupied but it's hard if my wing isn't in the immediate vicinity). I feel like this is partly just that I'm not 100% over approach anxiety, but I also feel like I've done everything I could possibly think of to get rid of it. Earlier this year I was going into field AT LEAST twice a week (during the summer around four nights a week) doing multiple mixed sets every night and just trying to push myself to do the hardest shit I could. And STILL I have this problem. It's really frustrating and I just don't know how I can fix this.

My goal is to simply go into a club/bar and, after my first approach, do the very next one i see, and repeat the process for the rest of the night with maybe a FEW short breaks. I realize that this is the only way to really get good and is probably the reason i haven't progressed as quickly as i should be. i feel like I should be spending like 90% of my time in set when I'm out. To do anything less, to me, is like going to the gym, doing like 3 reps, and going home. It doesn't matter how long you're there, it matters how much you're working.

Anyways anyone that's changed themselves into an approach machine (as opposed to just being one of those rare, lucky few that are just naturally approach machines), please give your input. It'd be greatly appreciated.

Thanks guys.

The truth is that you never really get rid of AA...you just learn to manage it and it sounds like you do a decent job at it since you went out so often and opened so many sets.

I think the idea some PUA schools promote is just to open "any" set no matter what -- even just to get into a talkative state...but really it is just an attempt to break your shyness patterns and get you out. As you get more advanced and learn enough about social dynamics -- you can start to read people, etc. and realize that you don't have to open everyone.

What I would be more concerned about is not your inner game or AA but rather your outer game because it seems like you are opening a lot of sets but they are not "sticking". It looks like you are trying to be friends with everyone but they keep back turning you and blowing you out. As other girls in the room see this --- it lowers your value. I would also be careful of not looking too much like a dancing monkey or having too high of an energy level relative to the set.

You should probably review your openers, tactics, body language, etc.

I think Fun Loving Teddy Bear might have a point to try solo sarging.

I'd even recommend trying different venues, mixing up day and night game or hanging out with different groups etc. since your issue does not seem like an AA issue as much as an outer game one. You may initially get over AA -- but I bet if you have to do 1000 approaches just to have one fattie UG kiss you --- you will re-develop AA BUT for OTHER reasons

Personally, when I do actually go out to a night club or pub...I pick my sets and "might" open 1 or 2 mixed or female sets --- but they have a high higher probability of sticking with me a long time.

i've been having this exact same problem too.

it's like, some days i'm on FIRE: moving from set to set to set, initiating conversation, being funny, acting with moxie. i believe this is called being "in state".
other days though, it's like i revert back to AFC mode: i can't think of what to say, i'm not confident, i don't approach, i wander around... this is being "out of state", or experiencing a "state drop".

see, the thing is, when i'm in state, it's like, all the logistical problems disappear. i don't have to think about what to do or say; it just happens. i don't have to use memorized openers or DHVs or hooks; they just come to me naturally. unfortunately, this comes to me very rarely, i'd say 1 out of every 8 sarges. there's no rhyme or reason for it either; some days i have it, some days i don't.

i see two possible solutions to this problem:
1. figure out a way to get in state more often. i think this can be accomplished through inner game work: tell myself i'm the most interesting, charismatic, fun person in the room, believing in myself, disconnecting myself from any expectations and just have fun, practicing positive self talk, etc.
2. find a way to function even when i'm out of state. this is where those memorized openers, hooks, DHVs, etc. come in handy. a good thing about this too is that just by doing a couple sets (even with your "memorized crutch") can get you into state.

i would like some advice on how to achieve these two solutions.
1. how do you get yourself back into state once you've lost it? how do you STAY in state?
2. what do you do when you're not feeling in state?

Same things happen to me. Sometimes got lots of number closes in one night while sometimes got high AA. It depends on my energy, if I got good energy before I go into field, I can easily maintain my energy even I got rejections at the beginning. But if I got low energy, I have to figure out a way to shift it, like purely enjoy the music for 5 minutes, dance with the music, talk to my wing to pump my BT up.

My suggestions: prepare well before you go into field, tell yourself "I'm the man! I'm gonna have so much fun tonight!" when you looking at the mirror and doing your hair. Pump the music up when you driving, talk to your wing, play jokes on him (One thing I like to do is to neg my wing if we are not with any girls. I neg really hardly haha, so my group laugh, everyone's energy got pumped up). Once you feel your energy goes down, not "in-state", talk to your wing, enjoy the music and tell yourself to come back coz you here to pick up girls to have fun!