FR #26 - I Need to be Sexual

This was a shit night. Let me preface this by saying I had a shit tastic night... It sucked.

But I learned the most from my failures. Here's what happened.

HUB 51 - 2 BLEACH BLONDES

Talking with these 2 blondes for a while, my wing Ronnie was with me instead of Cesar, since he's out of commission after a Jujitsu spar gone wrong. I'm building comfort and energy is dovetailing into C, but 2 black dudes literally push me out of the way and start talking to the girls. The black guys blocked me out and the girls completely forgot about me... I got tooled like a fucking chump...

I'm having a cigarette with the guys outside and the blondes walk out with the black guys... I'm fucking pissed off... I can't believe I got AMOG'd in the worst way possible...

Next set - HB8 Blonde

She's standing outside the club frantically texting. I ask her who she's drunk text messaging. She's fairly drunk, not super, but fairly. We talk for a while, I spin her and she is laughing, holding my hand and having a ton of fun. We go inside the club (I skipped the line, HA!) and we go to the bar. We order drinks and she tries to sucker me in to pay for both drinks. I told her, "Hey, you gotta pay for your drink!" I paid for mine. She gets super pissed off and goes away. She fakes that her friends are in the corner and walks away saying, "Have a good night..."


The other sets I did are irrelevant. I got some numbers but it doesn't matter. I had a mini-revelation tonight, and I want to share this with everyone:

As an Asian guy, I don't come off as a sexual character thanks to movies, mass media, stereotypes, and all that bullshit. I need to come with sexual intent and to show girls I am a sexual being, I know how to have sex (and I'm decent at it too), and i have intentions of taking a beautiful girl home to have a night of passion and adventure. I need to pull girls into my reality, but they never see my reality as sexual. Sure I've had quite a few successes, but I need to come off as a sexual being, and need to show my intent to the girl.

This is where I come to all of you here on the forum, humble and humiliated from this night, but willing to learn and expand my game... HOW DO I PORTRAY MYSELF AS A SEXUAL BEING?????

Thank you all for your replies,
Ben J.

I can understand how frustrating it is to get AMOG'ed by dudes and see them walk away with the girl. Still happens to me every now and then. I just try to shrug it off. Easier said than done, I know. I guess all you can really do is try your best to BLP, especially when you don't have any other big dudes around you to have your back, so to speak.

Anyways, coming off sexual! Right from the beginning, I try to frame everything sexual. I'll make innuendos. If she says something, I flip it around and make it sexual. I look deeply in her eyes with my eye lids relaxed, and talk slow right away.

We are all taught to come in with high energy! It's the easiest way to open, right?

However, you CAN come in with low energy and open successfully. It's possible... the trick is to be very sexual. How? Once you open with a direct opener, for example, you need to continue talking slow and not hold back on the escalation. If she passes your CTs, keep going.

So, for example, Let's say I come in with a direct opener... "You... look.... ABSOLUTELY.... beautiful, tonight...". Don't break eye contact, relax your eye lids, and continue to smile. I'll go through a little fluff and banter. I'll continue talking slow. Then I'll throw in sexual jokes here and there. When she says something, I flip it around to make it sexual. For example, she says something with the word "hard" in it. You can say something like, "Oh, you like it hard?" Or she says something with the word "wet". You say something like, "That's okay, I like it wet." Say it slow and in a playful way like you are joking, but you're not. lol. Don't break eye contact and just smile... not a big smile, but an easy smile. The moment you look away, she will think you're full of shit, so don't look away. When she plays along, you're in.

Anyways, that's just me and what I do. If, let's say she reacts badly to you're innuendos, for example, you say, "You like it hard?" and she's like "EWW WHAT?!" You can always flip it back and change your tone to a more regular or higher energy and look confused and say, "WHAT?! I just asked if you like it hard. You know, difficult." Lol. Just like what Gareth talks about in his Text to Sex program. Then gradually go slower again. If she reacts funny, I would say she is just testing you to see if ARE YOU REALLY that sexual guy?

I think some good examples of low energy and coming off sexual right away is Hank Moody from Californication. This is just my opinion and I recently I've been trying to carry myself more like him. It's worked for me a little but I'm still experimenting with it. lol. Hank Moody can be very simple and direct and also flip things sexual in a cocky funny way. In my opinion, a natural. There is some debate on how it's unrealistic that he can fuck the girl right away just minutes after talking to her... but I think it just comes down to logistics. LOL. But his attitude and the way he interacts with women are priceless. If you haven't watched the show, check it out and be the judge for yourself. Here's a good clip.

Skip to :40...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ef9_KPnYz4

Ben,
I'd say kino the hell out of each set. For example, if you had one or both bleach blondes with their arms around you, that means in order to push you out of the way, the black guys would've had to man-handle the blondes and in turn, disqualify themselves. They'd look like morons walking up and yanking the girls' arms off of you.

You're smart. You know when kino is going to hurt more than help. But it sounds like your verbal game is good enough to get to C Phase quickly and BT spike with good timing so that a window for kino and escalation is opened in a short period.

Keep it up. Shitty nights happen.

Shit happens, like what happens me to sometimes. I do relate to that since I get frustrated the hell out of me when girls don't take me seriously since I'm Asian and all, etc. As Mike said, just try to shrug it off and keep on going. It's a numbers game and when you hit high numbers, chances are there will be things happening on both ends of the extremes, whether it be super good or super bad.

I guess you can try portraying your sexual energy right from the start, like Mike said. A lot of us stay too long in the comfort zone, too and that's our own fault as a human being.

We have it harder than other people, I know, but it's not impossible elsewise J.T. couldn't have started this bootcamp and Asian males be extinct due to lack of targets to procreate =P. Don't be discouraged. You'll be fine.

Hey Ben:

I agree 110% with what Mike said...Going sexual from the very start is amazingly fun to do especially if the girl reacts into your sexual mode, it is quite an effective technique, sometimes a lot more so than going high energy and funny...

I love opening sexual during day game, as I feel a bit weird going too high energy during broad daylight. Opening sexual also works during night time in club venues, especially if I'm dressed to the Nines, but I don't do this as often as I would during the day because sometimes I feel like the noisiness and energy around me may drown out my lower energy.

In addition to Californication (I haven't seen any of it until Mike's clip), another amazing character to model your sexual energy after is Chuck Bass in Gossip Girls (yes yes I know it's a girls show...), he carries his conversation slowly and with a deep voice, in addition to the classic sleepy eyes and slightly sideways "bad-boy" smile... From the clips I've seen, I feel as Hank Moody is better with the cocky funny quips but Chuck Bass is a lot better with the physical gestures and facial expression.

Have fun bud.

Chuck Bass and Hank Moody:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X921CZQeqlk

lol.